OMG - who knows

So I'm off to get the sperm now.

I recalled Columbia and they said they are very very busy and will call me back.  They will try and take me if they can.

I called Shady Grove and they said they can't take me as I'm not a patient and it takes 4 weeks to be a patient.

I recalled my evil bitch on call doctor.  Hopefully she will call me back.  I HATE HER!  She can't take my calls because it's not an emergency (said yesterday) but maybe now she will see the light.  This is an emergency - otherwise I loose a month and money.

So for those who wonder why I can't do it myself - I can't.

I don't have the equipment and I don't want to risk dropping $400 worth of sperm on the floor.  I have to insert a tube into my cervix and make sure its up in there nice and high.  I can't do that.

I am on a shit ton of hormones that have made me gain 30 lbs and put my emotions through a blender.  I'm ripe and I need to be inseminated today by a medical professional who knows what they are doing.

If it was something I could have done myself I would have done this without doctors a year ago.

Please send prayers and well wishes.  Its going to be a huge let down today if I can't do it.  My ovaries are dancing something fierce, which is supposedly the best sign ever.